Time alone doesn’t have to be lonely

If there are any positives we can take from the pandemic and subsequent lockdowns, I feel our renewed focus on mental health is one.

During the pandemic we were faced with many and varied mental health challenges. As we all tried to adapt and get through it in our own ways, one issue cropped up for many of us, particularly those living alone – loneliness.

A waste of time?
Spending time on your own might not sound like any kind of hardship, and given the other challenges people were facing, it probably wasn’t. But in a world where we can seem to place such value on #squadgoals and photos with friends on Instagram, how can we reframe time spent on our own as time well spent, rather than time wasted?

I’ve always been quite sociable and enjoy spending time with people, which is probably why I associated time on my own as time wasted. So when the pandemic hit I was worried how I’d cope. Spending a lot of time on my own was now a reality I couldn’t avoid.

Some of the difficulties others faced during the pandemic really put my worries into perspective. Although I struggled with loneliness, I knew I was still in a very fortunate position as I didn’t have to juggle home schooling or caring responsibilities on top of a full time job. In her book, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, author and psychotherapist Amy Morin explains how time alone can actually help you build empathy and spark creativity. Reframing time on your own and thinking of it as a gift really helped me shift my mindset to embrace the privilege of alone time.

What can we do?
We all need social contact, but time alone doesn’t have to be lonely. I mean, even Bill Gates takes a couple of weeks each year to be on his own, switch off from technology, and refocus. Thinking of alone time differently and embracing it to do things just for you can be a game changer! Whether it’s doing something as simple as having a nice bath, making some good food, or something bigger like going to see a show or a film you fancy, take some proper time just for you. There are loads of things we can do to enjoy these times and invest in ourselves.

I found making a list of priorities and what I’d do if I could do anything really helped me. Thinking about how you can achieve those things and doing something about it can be a really productive use of time too. I’m not going to pretend I did this all the time… I spent plenty of time listening to tunes and watching football, but I don’t dread not having plans with other people now.

Time alone won’t, and shouldn’t, replace time with family and friends, but I’ve found trying to shift my mindset to see time on my own as a luxury has really helped me make the most of those moments. Let us know what you do to make the most of your time on your own.